Seems that all of a sudden I began to miss a whole lot of people, a whole of lot things, and after all, I do not know what or whom I miss. Maybe gains have to be accompanied by losses. At least at home I wouldn't feel so displaced, although temporarily. I miss OX a lot. and miss Shi Yi a lot. After this year my senior will leave me and well, I have one companion less. I miss the times when I could pinch people. when I could sing Peking Opera during the recesses. when I communicated with Shi Yi with our secret gesture. when I played with mud during PE. when I was not detached nor attached to the class but enjoyed it tremendously anyway. when I could pon school as many times as I wanted. when Ping sat next to me. when I treated everybody as my younger sister or brother. when I did not have to miss anyday anything.

And now, how similar, and however how different. The same slacker, just older, three years older compared to then. Three years can make a huge difference. Okay there is no mud for me to play with, at least not in PE. And OX is far far away (He has been far far away since five years ago?) . And I have stopped dreaming about him. And Shi Yi still doesn't appear in my dreams. When I say I would like to pinch you, please just take it as a verbal threat. I won't. I simply won't. I have not practised that for three years. And three years can make a huge difference. Ping asked me if it is supposed to be good that I feel as if the old days relive. I don't know the answer. Good, or not. But this time one year less.

Back at that time there was no La Liga supporter? And it was during those days when I got to know Iker. You couln't probably imagine their astonishment when they heard that I began to follow soccer. And they thought me crazy. Well, maybe. During last year's World Cup I was posting tonnes of nonsensical messages which got them onto the edge of breaking down. Sigh, why am I mentioning these.

How I wish Crabbie would be here. One more companion. And he wouldn't be struggling so hard like now. But he chose the other track anyway.

A hand stretched out without being held tight by any other hand. An earth with millions of lights flickering but a night sky void of twinkling stars. A mirror-like window without reflecting the thoughts of the darkness. A night. A laptop. A ME.